On the 4th Day of Dingtember My True Love Gave To Me…

Reefer Badness is the sponsor of today’s live show, where I do nothing but call people whose car I’ve accidentally dinged.

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Brad Carter

I run this town.

10 thoughts on “On the 4th Day of Dingtember My True Love Gave To Me…

  • September 4, 2015 at 8:16 pm
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    Am I about to lose you to the fame you deserve…

  • September 5, 2015 at 6:57 am
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    Looking forward to the dingtember calls those will be funny ones. cheers :)

  • September 5, 2015 at 4:46 pm
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    The second last lady was so nice I thought. Very excited and lovely personality, she never got mad at you.

  • September 8, 2015 at 8:53 am
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    Car Ding Note Ideas

    – Their car was being used as a prop for a commercial and it was finger in the process of the shoot.
    – Same thing as above except it was a porn video.
    – You were hoping that they would pick up the note and throw it down on the ground so you could obtain their fingerprints for a crime scene investigation.
    – Their car was the same one you saw parked outside your ex girlfriends house last night.
    – You are just apologizing to random people for things you’ve done in the past as part of your 12-step program.
    – You dinged their car because you saw them throwing a to-go cup out the window.
    – Your just trying to accumulate phone numbers to develop a phone book in which the directory is arranged by the car they drive.
    – Your ex wife is going around town and putting these notes in your car trying to get you in trouble. Call Dark Stranger with the person who called you on the line to confront her about it.
    – You made a typo in the note and meant to say, “pinging your car.” From there explain how you were trying to hack into their car from your house.
    – That note was to simply get them to call you so you can serve them with a supena for unpaid child support.

  • September 8, 2015 at 7:32 pm
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    I’d like to reiterate my suggestion from the last time about claiming you were under their car and dinged it, then when they ask why explain you were doing some work. I don’t know why but I find it the funniest!
    Also:
    – You could claim the reason they don’t see any damage is because it was all emotional. Like “I had a bad day at work and I called your car a jackass and said it looked stupid. I realized it was wrong and tried to apologize but it didn’t respond so I left you the note”. Special bonus points if you can get people to apologize to their cars on your behalf or talk to their cars in general.

    – Next time someone calls and says they were at WalMart or whatever tell them the reason you kicked their car or whatever is because they were parked (like an asshole) in your “employee of the month” spot, an award you win by exemplary customer service. Seems like hypocrisy riles people up, plus they’ll instinctively want to take revenge by calling a manager at WalMart rather than thinking the cops need to be involved. Doesn’t even matter if it was a good parking spot, since it makes it that much more petty to kick their car over it.

    – Some of the things from the lube job pranks seem like they would apply nicely, like “I tripped on the bumper when I was converting your car to electric”.

    – You didn’t see very many church stickers on their car so you said a prayer over it, but you got some of the words backwards and may have cursed it accidentally. I.e.: They’re not good Christians but it’s easy to curse a car by mistake since you don’t go to church very frequently yourself.

    – You were eating your lunch off of their car and ate part of the car by mistake.

    – You thought you would be nice by adding the rest of their Red Bull to their gas, for the obvious octane boost, but you got too excited and dropped the can on their car a couple times in the process.

    – You were cooking something using the heat from their engine and slammed the hood kind of hard when you were done.

    Lastly: I’ll be in 425 next week — would it be good to leave notes there or is that too close to pranking locally?

  • September 9, 2015 at 11:22 am
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    Idea: your dog had fleas and was scraping and smothering its ass all over the hood of the car to relieve its itching

  • September 28, 2015 at 9:51 pm
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    What are you having for lunch? Big Selation, what the hell is that?? Wish that could he in the intro

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